Adjusting Into A Long Distance Relationship

When I started connecting with my boyfriend he lived away in Burnaby. Only a two hour ferry ride and a bit of driving separated us. For the longest time, we were only accustomed to the long distance ways. However, he then came back home for the Summer. We took advantage of that time and spent every second possible together. Although you make tons of memories, the down fall is when they have to leave again. This time, he was not only leaving off the island to the mainland, he was moving a whole province away. Now this might not seem like a big deal because only a quick flight and an uber separates us now. This is true… but many other factors make seeing each other much more difficult. Our schedules are a complete mess. We are both full time students and I work on top of it. Not to mention the financial constraints of being students. When flights are $400 round trip, a quick weekend visit makes you rethink things.

The adjustment to him leaving has been anything but easy. I’ve felt lonely, spent sleepless night and no matter how much long distance love I was getting, it just wasn’t filling the void of having him here.

I overall wasn’t feeling like myself. For a while I wished that he had never come home at all because I wouldn’t be feeling this way if he hadn’t. It wasn’t until I started going through all my photos,  remembering all the memories we made and how much closer we became in those three months of being together full time, that I accepted the new distance between us.

Here is a couple of the little tricks we use to make the time apart easier:

Communication: We live in a lucky world where we have so many resources to bridge the geographical gaps between our loved ones. All I can say is use these resources to KEEP THE COMMUNICATION GOING! Even something as simple as a good morning text message can make all the difference. We like to use FaceTime, even if we study while on it together, or having nightly talks.

Know your phone plan. Don’t get stuck with hefty phone bills. Know what your plan includes and work with it. Many plans, like mine, have unlimited calling after 6pm and weekends, which can be a huge saviour for those long chats.

The Future: As scary as it may seem at first, talking about the future makes long distance easier. It lets you know that the distance is temporary and gives you both goals to work towards. Stay within your comfort zone of what kind of topics to touch on that relate to the future but don’t feel like you shouldn’t talk about it at all.

Time Gap: We are lucky because we only have a one hour time gap. That being said, scheduling things can sometime be a pain. “Did he want to FaceTime at 9 my time or his?”. Remember to clarify this and set aside reasonable amounts of time that work for both of you to chat.

Be Sensitive: Just because you are feeling secure and happy with how the long distance relationship is working, doesn’t mean your partner is. Check in with them and be there if they aren’t feeling great. Highs and lows happen and they are going to need your help along the way.

When its you feeling a little off, don’t be afraid to say something. Voice how you feel and if the relationship is strong and mature enough, you will be able to talk threw it and solve any issues.

Trust: People constantly ask about how trust plays into long distance. My answer has always been if you don’t trust them you shouldn’t be with them. If you find yourself social media stalking them or keeping yourself up at night thinking about what they may be doing and who they are doing it with, that relationship needs some work. Be with someone who you are confident in and who you trust will do the right thing.

Remember The Little Things: Those “how was your day?”, “I love you” and “I appreciate you” statements go so far. They are small but meaningful.

 

 

Knocking Out Back To School Nerves!

“Are you ready for back to school?” said everyone of my customers and co-worker.

Good question.

As some may know, I have anxiety. It is anxiety that is very livable, but this is because I really focus on what I need in order to be the most successful version of myself. Going back to school is one of those times that is a little more challenging. Lots of expenses accumulate, your schedule does a complete 360, and it means more brain work rather than physical work. Now, going into my third year of university, I think I have a smooth transition almost figured out.

Here are a couple of my little tricks:

-Get prepared well in advance. After August long weekend, start thinking about what you need to get done and write yourself a list. I try to knock one thing off this list every day.

-Set yourself a realistic budget for how much back to school will cost you.

-Start looking for textbooks for sale well in advance, you can get great deals on used books and save loads of money.

-Start posting about your used textbooks to receive some money back.

-Get yourself and agenda and consistently update it. Seriously, put your life into this book.

-Cut the liquor, cut the bad foods, increase the water in take and get thinking about your exercise routine and how it can be improved.

-Clean up your life! Clean the house, car, purse and anything else you frequently use or spend time in.

-Try giving meal prepping a go. The more prepared you are in the morning, the more time you’ll have to sleep in.

-Speaking of sleep, strive to get at least an 8 hour sleep. It makes a world of difference when you are well rested.

-Find a solid support system to help push you through the hard times.

Getting back to school is a hectic time. Learn what works for you in terms of beating the stress! Everyone is different, but I guarantee that getting a head start will lead to greater success.

Let me know the things you do to kick stress and anxiety’s butt by commenting below!

 

 

What’s Trending?: Hammocking

On Vancouver Island the trend of hammocking has exploded. People come in large groups and will hang hammocks off anything, anywhere, at anytime. These hammocks are very reasonably priced and easy to find. The best part about it, you get to hang with friends, relax and get outdoors. What could be better?

DCIM102GOPROGOPR4205.

I recently got a hammock for my birthday and had to go try it out. A friend and I set our hammocks up over top of one another at Nanaimo’s Neck point Park. The area over looking bay in the back of the park is a hot spot for hammockers. Within half an hour of being there, we had three other people join us in their hammocks.

Most trends are not all they are cracked up to be… but let me tell ya… after about five minutes I was so relaxed I was about to fall asleep (as you can see, I was ready to fall asleep in that picture).

I loved this evening activity so much that I bought a double hammock for my boyfriend’s birthday. This hammock was large enough that we could hang in it together, and this time, we really did nap. We chose an afternoon on Parksville’s Little Mountain to hang. If you bring a few snacks and a drink, it is the perfect little date. Not to mention, these hammocks are super light transportable and can be brought along on any adventure, whether it’s camping, hiking or a road trip.

Our Double Hammock: Amazon Double Hammock

Tip: Spend the extra money and get a hammock with the loop tree straps. This makes set up much faster and convenient.